If I were a dog, I would have my tail between my legs right now while giving you my best, sad puppy-dog-look. I know that I said that I would write every day, and I didn't. I had wanted to. Something inside of me really, really wants me to do this, and a lot of other things every day, and I find myself torn between that and the typical "normal" things that people need to do. You know, like go to work.
So I've decided to take some pro-active measures. My whole life, I've been doing what I figured I was "supposed" to do. I went to school, started a career, got married, bought a house, even started planning a family. Along the way, I kept thinking that at some point, I would run into my passion, my purpose, my very reason for being on this earth which would, in my own way, help make it a better place. I just had to keep trotting along in my "normal" life, following my "normal" script and all of a sudden this extraordinary moment would come and DING, it would hit me. That's how it happens, no? No.
And so I started shaking the box of Cheerios. All the love and goodness that was inside stayed right there, but it started to shift. Things began changing quickly and situations that were not meant for me began to dissolve in the most peaceful of ways. So much happened so fast - my appearance changed dramatically, my marriage ended, my house was sold, and still, there I was. Still standing in the eye of what could seem like a hurricane. Smiling.
Surely, this had to be the end of a major transformation, and so, I started to rebuild. I fell in love. I made myself a home that I adored only to learn that it was even better than I could imagine when shared with another. I allowed myself to live. And I love it. I realize now that there never was a storm, nor was there any danger. So I've decided to keep shaking that box of Cheerios, and keep going for the prize inside.
And so last Friday, I resigned from my job - a job I enjoyed for many years in a place that feels like a second home. Call it a gut feeling, following my heart or divine guidance - all I know is that each time I follow it, with my ego dragging behind kicking and screaming, it always leads me to happiness. Although I love writing here very much, there is so much more that I want to explore too, and I know that if I take that leap of faith, I'll find what it is I'm looking for.
So with an open heart and butterflies in my belly, I'm starting the most exciting type of adventure: the unscripted journey. There is so much that I want to tell you about it - the what's, the why's, the how's. I could be here all day. And soon, I'll be able to do just that, and so much more.
Photos, from top to bottom: If only I could be this cute, but at least I smell better - my Dad's "puppy" Sam; making my little mark at Parlee Beach in Moncton, NB.
Sylvie, je te souhaite ÉNORMÉMENT de bonheur et de succès dans cette nouvelle étape de ta vie! :-) Je serai heureuse de suivre tes péripéties ici, de connaître tes nouveaux projets qui seront sûrement super intéressants! Tu as une très belle plume et tu débordes de talents, je ne me lasserai jamais de te lire!
ReplyDeleteSylvie, you are a gutsy individual and I wish you all the best in your new adventures.
ReplyDeleteYou have a great attitude towards life and I am positive you will succeed in anything you do.
Enjoy your new freedom.
Love
Tante Suzanne
Ok - so first things first: the blog looks AWESOME! I love that you found a way to include your famous shoes and the little poodles who are much too curious for their own well-being!
ReplyDeleteSecond - you are one brave Cheerio loving weirdo! My "normal" side is yelling at you for quitting you job (yes, I too have a normal side!). But my crazy-hippie-Sylvie-inspired side is giving you two thumbs up. T'as beaucoup de courage, puis je suis contente que tu suis ton coeur. Tu m'inspires :)
Merci beaucoup everybody! The butterflies in the tummy are going a little bit bonkers - more like bouncing rubber balls, but that usually means something fun is on it's way. :-)
ReplyDeleteLife is sort of nice like that - whether you're in charge of pulling the reins or not - it will take you to the edge. You have two choices you can leap or you can simply go back to the path you just walked. Of course, the leap will take you on a whole new kind of adventure and so the brave leap. That's when we discover we have wings to fly and deciding to leap was the hardest part.
ReplyDeleteI guess what I am trying to tell you is that you have all you need and you'll be ok. Can't wait to see where this adventure takes you.
Sylvie,
ReplyDeleteIf the butterflies in your tummy are going a little bit bonkers, then, let them. They are probably going crazy with anticipation of what lies ahead. I think they know by now that something exciting is coming and they wish they could know ahead of time what it will be. But why hurry one of life’s adventures, sometimes it’s the anticipation, the wonder of the unknown that can make the journey exciting and unforgettable.
When you told me last week that you had quit your job, the normal mother reaction would probably be to panic, but just hearing you say the words “Mom, I quit my job”, it’s almost like you said, "Mom, I am excited and I want to see what other adventures life can bring me." There was no sadness, no regret in your voice, and maybe I’m not your typical Mom, but I was happy for you. I know that to live in this crazy world of ours we need to work so that we can pay rent, buy a house or whatever else we think we need in our lives. There is something more important though, being happy at what you are doing, feeling fulfilled and knowing that you are making a difference in the world. Sometimes life has a way of setting boundaries, we think we have to do this, and have to do that, and as we get older, well, we can’t wear this colour, you’re too old, or you can’t wear your hair like that, it’s too young for you. I’ve always said, where is it written, where does it say that I have to do this, or that I can’t do that. When children are small parents have to make decisions for them, and as they grow older you let them go and let them make their own choices and pray they make the right ones. You have a pretty good head on your shoulders, I mean that literally, you're pretty and the head is a good one. :-) So far, you have made good decisions in your life, you have asked our advice along the way at times, but basically you can stand on your own two feet and you're not afraid to take chances or try something new.
Ever since you’ve been a little girl you’ve always been passionate about anything you did. Whether it was colouring a picture, getting dressed up for Halloween, decorating cookies at Christmas and gingerbread houses, and yes, I even tolerated the gingerbread hooker and spaceship which would have made Martha Stewart pass out for sure. Then there was figure skating, modelling, swimming, debate classes, plays at school, anything you did you put all your energy into it. When you started university, after a few months, you had already decided that this wasn't the right choice for you, so you enrolled at Humber College and you seemed much happier, probably because you were doing something you liked and putting your talents to work.
Just know that whatever your passion turns out to be, whatever your purpose in life is, the world is a better place because you are in it. We, your family are the luckiest of all, because we get to share special moments with you, but anyone else that you meet along the way, their lives will be enriched by meeting you and having you as a friend.
You’ve travelled to several places across the world, you’ve met some fantastic people along the way, so, the journey ahead can only lead to new beginnings, new friendships along life’s path. You are young, what better time, to explore all of life’s possibilities. So, go ahead, shake the box of Cheerios, and keep going for the prize inside, I have a feeling it will be something very special, and just remember, that sometimes it’s the little prizes in life that will bring you the most happiness.
I know that you can accomplish anything you put your mind to, and you know that if ever you need advice or support along your new journey, that both me and Dad are always here for you and we will always cheer you on.
Je t'aimes beaucoup, Mom XOXOXO
WOW Sylvie, you have a lot of great support behind you and now I know where you get some of your passion and smarts from .... your mom.
ReplyDeleteYou have known for a long time that this was never the place for you and we spoke many times about it but you knew that only you could make that leap of faith knowing what was on the other side would be new, better, different, exciting, challenging. Does it matter? You wouldn't know until you tried to leap, right?
All in all you are off and running and now I know that you won't settle unless it makes you happy. Life is way too short not to be happy especially at your job. Speaking of "job", I know I have been guilty of this until lately but way too many people in this world think that their job is their life, almost as though whatever job they do is what makes them who they are. Is that true? Does it? Is there that much importance on a job, a career, a lifelong commitment to a company that for the most part see's that employee as a number. Why do we put ourselves through hell sometimes and for what in return? It is just "a job", nothing more, nothing less. For those who feel it is their life, a career ... maybe they have found their happiness in that job but for most, it helps pay the bills, let's you buy clothes and looking forward to every Friday night where you know that the time is now yours until Monday morning and the cycle starts all over again.
You made the right decision Sylvie and I couldn't be happier for you. Will I miss you at work, yes. Will we keep in touch, most definately.
Spread those pretty little wings and soar Sylvie because I know you can.
Love ya Steve